First of all let me just say that Mitt Romney is a fucktard! I know I said yesterday that he couldn't possibly live with a dog, he is such a moron. BUT, now I hear that he had a dog, an Irish Setter, that he put into a crate, strapped to the roof of his car and drove to Florida. The dog had a serious diarrhea problem en route. Can you blame him? Well, this took place in the last century (1983) so maybe things were different then. He's still a fucktard. Oh. Mom doesn't want me talking like that. sorry.
Have a look at my new yellow frisbee. Well, mostly I guess it's me you see, but trust me, this new yellow one, is da bomb! Soft is good, because it doesn't hurt my teeth, plus I'm still working on my catching skills and sometimes the earth shifts on me unexpectedly; a soft frisbee doesn't hurt so much! Do you notice my beautiful markings? I have a small 'Hindu' spot in the center of my forehead, about where my 'third eye' is located. I don't think I look like anyone else in my family. Mom says Dad and I have the same nose in profile. I'm not sure. Mom told me something recently that's kind of a secret....I'm ADOPTED! Ssshh. See, I was born in Minnesota. Some people from Massachusetts wanted me because I am half-sister to their dog Lucy, who ran out in front of a snowplow and went over the Rainbow Bridge. They drove all the way out to Minnesota to get me, then drove me all the way back (INSIDE the car, Mitt!). I lived with them until I was 5 months old, then I was adopted by my mom and dad because my original parents were having a human baby and couldn't take care of both of us. Dad says he thinks my half-sister Lucy deliberately threw herself in front of the snowplow because the people had weird ideas about dogs. I don't remember much, but Mom says they had a little tiny crate for me that made me stay on my belly. I wasn't allowed on furniture and I couldn't go anywhere there was carpeting. And they would only play with me at certain times. I was becoming "Neurotic". Mom and Dad let me go anywhere I want to go...it's my house too! (Mitt don't fit!! Mitt don't fit!) And the weird thing is, Dad's dog Jasmine had recently crossed the Rainbow Bridge. He missed her a lot. I look a lot like her and I just suddenly appeared in their lives! Mom and Dad think Jasmine arranged for me to go and live with them so they wouldn't miss her so much. I don't know. It was 5.5 years ago and I don't really remember any other life! Adoption is kind of cool you know. It means that your parents CHOOSE you! But in China Mom says families can only have one child. Everyone wants boys and no one wants girls, so girl babies usually get adopted. (sometimes they get left outside to die.) This China place also apparently eats dogs with rice, so I'd say they have some humanity issues. I guess this China place has been allowing people from here to adopt all their baby girls, only now they are going to require that the people who adopt be thin, young and without medical problems. (because they want the best for the children.) If they really want the best for the children, then why are they letting people kill them or adopt them? How dumb is that. And why were they sending us poisoned dog food, and now other poisoned stuff? Who is watching them? They are sucking up all the oil and steel and aluminum and are probably making lots of pollution because they just don't care about the earth very much. They don't seem to appreciate females very much. What will they do if that Hillary lady gets to be president?
I was thinking about all that while I did a little sunbathing this afternoon. Then I ran around with Mom and she threw Old Yeller (the frisbee) for me. I'm thinking it's chow time pretty soon. Maybe I can get Dad to give me some ice cream. You coming?
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